Ready or not, Kevin Federline is making his rap debut.
A clip of a track titled "Y'all Ain't Ready," from Federline's upcoming album, The Truth, was posted on the Internet this week by his producer, Disco D, providing listeners with an advance sample of Mr. Britney's dubious vocal abilities.
The clip rapidly traversed entertainment-related sites and blogs the Internet over, drawing derisive reviews wherever it touched down--which, to be fair, was what the impressively prescient Federline predicted in a line from the song.
"My prediction is that y'all gonna hate on the style we create, straight 2008," he raps on the track.
And how right he was.
"And you're sure this isn't just something off Vanilla Ice's Hard to Swallow album?" one commenter asked on Stereogum.com, a site where the track was available for download. "I'm about ready to start shaving stripes in my eyebrows."
"This has got to be a joke, right? Is he serious? Better yet, if he is serious, can we shoot him before he breeds? Oops, too late," lamented another commenter to the site.
Though there's already an abundance of human beings who can rightfully refer to Federline as "Daddy," the oft-cornrowed hip-hop hopeful isn't limiting use of the title to his own offspring.
No, according to the chorus of "Y'All Ain't Ready," K-Fed wants everyone to put the paternal title to use.
"Back then they called me K-Fed/ But you can call me Daddy instead," he suggests, demonstrating that he is an individual who recognizes both the power of rhyme and the importance of family.
Despite his eerily accurate prediction that people will hate the style he creates, Federline remains optimistic about the eventual response to his debut album.
"But I know that you really can't wait/ 'Cause people always askin' me when's the release date?" he intones. But he's not going to give it to us that easily, oh no.
"Well maybe, baby, you can wait and see/ Until then all these Pavarottis following me," Federline continues, coining a clever nickname for the paparazzi that we really just don't get. (Unless maybe it's like a private joke with Britney or something? Nope, we still don't get it.)
One thing's for certain: Spears does not need to worry about getting eclipsed by her baby daddy anytime in the near future.
On Thursday, an eBay auction selling a royalties percentage in her song "Everytime," from 2003's In the Zone, closed at nearly $173,000.
Spears is preparing to drop a remix album, titled B in the Mix, The Remixes on Nov. 22.
Mercifully, Federline's album doesn't have a release date yet.